Which Berg Are You?

An exploration of the different ways users navigate Facebook

            I was intrigued to see Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook, and Jesse Eisenberg, the actor who portrayed Zuckerberg in ‘The Social Network,’ standingside by side on the January 29 episode of Saturday Night Live. The historic meeting of these two bergs was quite the spectacle. Both men seemed a tad uncomfortable in front of the camera, but whereas with Eisenberg it seemed to be merely common, expected pre-show nerves, Zuckerberg just appeared completely out of place. Zuckerberg, alleged to be somewhat socially awkward and stiff, reputedly appeared on the show to try and do away with said perception. However, in the eyes of this viewer, he merely succeeded in enhancing it. After the monologue ended and the show got underway (without any additional appearances from the Zuck), Eisenberg really settled into his own. His comfort in front of the camera was palpable, emanating a smoothness and ease that I’m sure has been perfected through the nineteen films he’s done to date. Zuck never found his feet. The two different levels of social grace that emanated from the respective bergs got me thinking about two separate modes of conduct Facebook users generally adopt on the website, modes that I will respectfully refer to as the Eisen and the Zuck.

            The relaxed, comfortable approach to using Facebook, the approach that favors its safer and more innocent sides, is what I would like to call the Eisen aspect. We are Eisen-ing when we post on each other’s walls cool links to wacky YouTube videos we’ve stumbled upon, when we like comments and pictures that speak to us, when we create events to go hang out with friends, and when we peruse through the photos later on to relive and enjoy the experience once more. These are all kinds of behavior I would place in the Eisen category. Breezy, fun, light, enjoyable – all types of behavior we might associate with the glossy smile of Jesse Eisenberg. 

            Conduct that I would deem worthy to place in the Zuck category is what happens on the less wholesome, seedier side of the network. I’m talking about the creepy, nerdy, obsessive, stalker-y side to it (please forgive me, Mark). You all know the type of Facebook etiquette I’m referring to; it’s the zoning in on the pages of girls/guy we find attractive and interesting, the repeated click, click, clicking through image after image long after what's acceptable. I remember there was a Facebook group a few years back called ‘BodyBook’ which basically existed to show the large number of girls who seemed to use the site solely to post risqué photos of themselves in compromising situations. Such behavior might make a person wary of putting themselves out there on the site. Using the site for these seedy sort of activities is perhaps exemplified best by Eisenberg (portraying Zuckerberg) in one of the earliest scenes in ‘The Social Network:’ The character Zuckerberg, drunk in front of his dorm room computer, hastily assembles an impressive site he calls Facemash, which basically rates pictures of girls side by side to determine which one is ‘hotter.’  These modes of behavior are neither graceful nor cool, nor are they something we would necessarily want to place in front of a camera (much like Mr. Zuckerberg, smirk).

            Of course it’s unfair of me to equate Zuckerberg with that sort of voyeuristic creepiness. Uncomfortable though he appeared in front of the red light on SNL, there is absolutely no basis to associate him with the sort of anti-social behavior I’m lending his name to. Which is why I would like to once more reference that colorful episode of SNL. The Digital Short of that week was a horrifyingly creepy song/video appropriately called 'The Creep'. This amusingly uncomfortable video highlighted the three members of The Lonely Island slinking as if upheld by marionettes towards attractive women. I would presume that these kind of socially challenged oddballs with their pencil mustaches and oversized 70s-style glasses are the kind of men who'd engage in the kind of obsessive, socially graceless behavior I had been unfairly plugging as Zuck conduct. So as to not insult a man I’ve never met, I’m going to redact two modes of Facebook conduct to be the Eisen approach and the Creep approach.